What Great Church Leaders Actually Do

DEFINE REALITY, SERVE WELL, SAY THANK YOU

Leadership in ministry can feel like a constant balancing act. You sway from casting vision, making decisions, managing people, and navigating change. Max De Pree offers a simple framework that brings clarity to the leader’s role:

“The first responsibility of a leader is to define reality.
The last is to say thank you. In between, the leadeer is a servant.”

FIRST: DEFINE REALITY

This doesn’t mean just setting goals or writing a mission statement. It means telling the truth, with clarity and compassion, about where things really stand.

As a ministry leader, defining realtiy means naming both the strengths and the struggles in your ministry. It’s understanding what your people are carrying and what they hope for. It’s owning where you’re going and where you’re not yet. Like marketing expert Seth Godin says, the best leaders tell stories that match the worldview of their audience. For us, that’s our congregation. When we define reality well, we help people feel seen, heard, and invited into something meaningful.

IN BETWEEN: BE A SERVANT

Leadership in the church is not being in charge - it’s about taking care of people in your charge. Simon Sinek puts it this way: great leaders create environments where people feel safe, valued, and empowered to grow. That means your role is to create an environment where others can thrive, grow, and live out their calling. In a ministry setting, that also means modeling the love and humility of Christ. It’s not about hierarchy—it’s about shepherding.

In ministry, this looks like walking with people through joy and grief. It’s checking in when someone goes quiet. It’s noticing the volunteer who’s burning out and stepping in with support. It’s showing up early to set the tone and staying late to make sure others feel seen. It’s asking, “How can I help?” instead of “Who’s to blame?” It’s empowering your staff or volunteers instead of micromanaging. Servant leadership is more than a concept - it’s a way of living out the Gospel.

Servant leadership isn’t flashy, but it’s deeply powerful. When you serve your team well, they’re more likely to serve others well. And that ripple effect? That’s how culture is built—and sustained.

LAST: SAY THANK YOU

Gratitude may feel like a small thing, but it has lasting impact. A simple thank-you reminds your team that their work matters. It builds trust and loyalty. I worked for a pastor who was big about handwritten thank you notes. Once a month we had an all staff meeting and on every table would be a stack of blank note cards and pens. We were given time to write notes ot thanks and encouragement to our coworkers that were delivered to them the next day. I kept all of the notes I received.

You don’t have to wait for the perfect moment or an all staff meeting. Say thank you in the hallway, in an email, or in a handwritten note.

LEADERSHIP THAT BUILDS UP THE BODY

Church leadership is never just about running programs or managing teams. It’s about building up the Body of Christ. That starts by defining where we are with honesty, leading with a servant’s heart, and engaging every season, every service, and every staff interaction with gratitude.

Those three steps - defining reality, serve faithfully, say thank you - create a culture where people thrive, ministry grows, and Christ is glorified.